What he thinks What she thinks A novel by Wayne Barron
Advice to young parents (She called for me to save her.) Current Blog Entry
I lost my son on October 12, 2023
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I lost my son on October 12, 2023
Article Entry Date: November 30,2023
Carr Barron - Author & Photographer (Wayne Barron)
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Carr Barron

On October 11, 2023, I had a tooth pulled and had my granddaughter, October, with me. That evening, my son came by the house and gave his daughter a Library card he had gotten earlier in the day. We said goodbye as my son walked home three houses down from me.
That would be the last time I would see my son alive.
The next day, October 12, 2023, I sent my son a message and some money to pick up some groceries for me from the Food Lion he worked at.

I mowed the yards, both mine and his. I then returned to my place with my granddaughter and began collecting the recyclables and trash to carry off. I walked into the house to pick up the last few items when I heard a shotgun go off. I walked back outside, and we left to go over and grab the items from my son's place to carry off.
I began noticing a lot of traffic on our road, and we only get traffic if they are re-routing due to an issue on the roads. I became alarmed and started calling my son's phone, and he would not answer. This was not like him; he never NOT answered when I would call him. I called his wife, who was in the house, and asked her when she last spoke with him, and she said it was before he left work. I told her to start calling him, and I would keep trying, too.
October and I got in the truck and headed to the trash dump, where it was blocked off by a sheriff's officer. I went to the officer and told her that my son was not answering his phone, and I described his vehicle to her.
A few minutes later, while on the phone with my daughter-in-law, she asked me if Carr (My son) was with me, as she heard him yelling out for October. I told her that October was beside me, but Carr was not.
Nearly an hour later, two State Troopers came walking up the hill of the road to me. They asked me where my son worked, and I said, Food Lion, Apex. They then told me the one thing no family member ever wants to hear.
I am sorry to inform you, sir, but your son has passed away.


I lost it, I yelled. I nearly about fainted. The officers were trying to get me to calm down, and I tried telling them I had to get to my granddaughter, who was sitting in my truck.
We all walked over to her, and I sat down. She reached over, placed her precious hand on the side of my face, and told me, "Granddaddy, it's gonna be OK."
I looked at her and went numb. The officer told me.
"You have a special little girl there, Mr. Barron."
I looked up at the officer and told him. "This is my son's daughter."
The officer looked like he had seen a ghost, and his eyes watered up.

I left from there and pulled up at my son's house. His wife walked towards me as I got out of the truck, and she asked me.
"Was he in that wreck?" I nodded yes.
"Is he OK?" I nodded no.


Calling everyone just moments after finding out that my son was gone was so hard to do. That evening, I did not sleep. I closed my eyes and would open them and yell out. It took until the next day, my daughter-in-law's parents came over and talked with me before I was able to cry.
It is still hard to sleep, and I have to think of other things I want or need to do in order to sleep. I think about the books I have written or am writing, and I think about the projects I need to complete that I was going to do with my son, and I think about the future and what it holds for me and how I am going to navigate it without my son with me now. Being single does not help matters either. If you have someone with you during times like this, it helps more than you can possibly imagine. But I have no one, just my mother, whom I care for, and my other family members. Then I have my grandchildren, which I do not see much. It seems that since I lost my son, it feels like I have lost them too.
It is just hard to get through my days with this pulling and dragging feeling I have with me now.

As I mentioned above, I had heard a shotgun go off. Well, what I heard was the collision of my son's car and the other vehicle. It was a head-on collision, and my son died on impact. So I heard the sound of my son's death.
The voice my son's wife heard was most likely his spirit yelling out for his daughter.


Make sure you let everyone you love know how much they mean to you and how much it means to have them in your life.
To lose a child is the hardest thing in the world.
Thank you for reading this. It took a while for me to write about it. I think I was afraid to write it, as I was worried that I would have a permanent record of it that I would have to see every time I came onto my site. But I needed this, and I needed to write it. It helps when we can talk with others or write about our pains and struggles.
I send you all love and hope you have a wonderful Christmas this year and all the years to come.


My son's information.
(I call him Carr)
Sabastian Carr-Zatian Barron (10-16-1993 - 10-12-2023)
Wife - Jessica Mann Barron
Children
October Barron (6)
Iris Barron (4)
Daniel Barron (2)

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